YOLO of the Week: The Curious Case of Denim-on-Denim

Yesterday, I attended the Indians’ home opener, and, once again, exited Progressive Field without seeing a no-hitter.  Obviously, there was no need to save my ticket stub.

Wednesday, my friend/former English class co-conspirator/Ben Roethlisberger enthusiast Alex went bowling and witnessed history—a neighboring bowler (who I’ll refer to as Dre) was outfitted in a denim-on-denim ensemble.  Of course, he will not only frame his receipt, but donate it to the YOLO Hall of Fame.

In a display of characteristic Steeler fan braggadocio, Alex posted a photo of Denim Dre on Facebook so fast he nearly excreted, captioned “The double-denim combo.. Never thought I’d see the day.”  The image confirmed my longstanding suspicion that Alex was the type of person to frequent bowling alleys on Wednesday nights and engendered comments like “Canadian tuxedo.”  If that’s the case, I want a Canadian wedding with at least three of my future wives.

The denim bodysuit is not without its detractors.  It was singer Jessie J (of “Domino” fame) who announced last month, “Don’t trust people that wear denim on denim!”  Beliefs such as this are surprisingly widespread, and render Dre’s fashion sense all the more commendable.  Dre, a modern martyr, knew full well that he’d be immediately ostracized by the bowling alley’s close-minded patrons upon seeing his getup.  This didn’t matter.  Dre was committed to shattering the Scores Fun Center denim-on-denim barrier.  They would love him for his ambition, he reasoned.

A poll conducted by Harris Interactive showed a wide range of opinions on Dre’s antics.  Academics are currently tabulating the societal ramifications that stem from a jean buff gone wild.  The skeptics/haterz wish Dre would have donned the elusive denim hat to attain the highly sought-after triple crown.  Dre devotees claim that such a hat would obscure his immaculate head of hair.  Call me a fanboy—I tend to agree with the latter group.

When the news about leaked via Alex’s Facebook page, an unforgiving media blitz firmly entrenched itself between Dre and the life he once led.  I didn’t want to bother the poor guy; instead, I prodded Alex with a few questions.

What emotions coursed through your veins when you saw Dre for the first time?

I did a double-take, then immediately thought, “I need photographic documentation of this.”

In your wildest dreams, did you ever imagine witnessing something like this?

Actually, I wasn’t that surprised.  I was at Scores, so I couldn’t be, ya know?

I know.  Did you talk to him?  Did he seem approachable?

Nah.  No verbal contact.  I didn’t feel safe doing that since his team consisted of guys wearing Battlefield 3 and Mushroomhead t-shirts.

And yet he chose denim-on-denim.  Ain’t that something?

I guess.

Last question: My female readers are clamoring to know if Dre’s single or not.  Tell me—was he with a lady friend?

No.  I assume he had a fellow Mushroomhead-loving companion at home, though.

What can we learn about life from Dre?  A lot, really.

One shouldn’t make style decisions based on social precedent alone.  Blaze trails.

The best place to flaunt the denim-on-denim look is at a quasi-sketchy bowling alley’s Wednesday night league.

And finally: You only live once, but you can certainly wear denim twice.  In one night.  At the same damn time.

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